Keeper of Sauron's Sanity
by All-Knowing Alien 2
Summary: The origins of Koss, as written by Dagniro Vanaliel, not me, and posted here with permission for the convenience of my readers. It is advisable to read 'I WON, I WON, NEENER, NEENER, NEENER' first, at least until the second chapter.


**Alien: Alright. This is the original 'Keeper of Sauron's Sanity', as written by Dagniro Vanaliel. She has since deleted the story from her account, but I have gotten her permission to repost it here, to make life easier for me and my readers. So enjoy, and then go review my fic. (Seriously, I mean it.)**

**I have not edited anything. **

Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings.

Author's Note: This is the story of Lana, one of the Mary-sues trapped inside Middle-earth. The text in italics indicates the story; the other text indicates what Lana is thinking and feeling.

Chapter One: Lana

The girl pushed her hair out of her face and squinted at her computer screen. She was an ordinary girl, not pretty, but not ugly either. She had dirty blonde hair to her shoulders and blue-grey eyes. Her figure was slim, though she was lacking in the upper areas. She was thirteen or thereabouts, and she was one of the many followers and Mary-sue writers of the Lord of the Rings.

She was currently working on a wonderful story, one where the beautiful Lana won the heart of the Elven archer Legolas.

_Lana was the daughter of Elrond, _she typed. _She was beautiful, with shining chocolate waves to her perfectly shaped hips. Her waist was pinched in, and her chest pushed modestly at her revealing, yet perfectly modest, gown. Her sapphire eyes surveyed the room. Elrond loved to throw feasts, and this one was in her honor. It was time she chose a husband..._

Rivendell began to change. Elves that should not have been there were suddenly present, Elrond had a grand dining hall with crystal chandeliers, and, worst of all, Lana appeared.

She was exactly how the author had written her. She was gorgeous, and all the Elves gaped at her, male and female alike (for the author had to put minor slash in there, though it served no point to the story). She sat at the center of the high table, her father on one side and her sister Arwen on the other.

_Lana looked around the room, trying to find the Elf that stood out from the rest. Finally, her eyes found a blond elf in a forest green tunic. She floated over to him and rested her hand on his shoulder. _

"_Excuse me," Lana said. The Elf turned. "May I ask what your name is?"_

"_Certainly," the Elf said. "My name is Prince Legolas of Mirkwood, son of King Thranduil. Who are you?"_

"_I am Lana, youngest daughter of Lord Elrond."_

"_My lady," Legolas said, bowing ironically to her. "Would you care to dance?" Lana accepted, and Legolas led her out onto the dance floor._

Lana shook her head. She was very confused, and she had no idea why she was dancing with Legolas. She shouldn't even exist! She was horribly out of place. But before she could leave, a strong tug came. She leaned in towards Legolas, as if to kiss him.

_Legolas pulled Lana towards him, and placed his lips upon hers. They stayed that way for awhile, until Legolas broke the kiss._

"_I am sorry, Lady Lana. Please forgive me."_

"_There is nothing to forgive, Legolas," Lana said, and she returned his kiss._

Lana tried to scream, tried to push Legolas away, but she was unable to move. She was bound completely to the author's will. She was a pawn, a slave. She had to escape.

Luckily for her, the chapter ended with that last sentence, and the author left her computer. Lana sighed with relief. Counting on the girl's tiny memory span, she wouldn't remember this story. It would give Lana time to escape.

She thought her hardest, trying to find the posted story on Fanfiction, the girl's homepage. It didn't take very long; the idiot had left her computer with the posted story up. Navigating her way through cyberspace, Lana deleted the girl's story.

She was free.

Chapter Two: Koss

Lana ran out of Rivendell, not sure where she was headed. All she knew was that she was free, and that she would no longer be tormented by the author.

She rested against a tree, all of her energy gone. It was no small task to run in such an impractical gown as the one she wore. It was flowing and lacy and had many layers. It stuck to her body with the heat of the night, and she often stepped on rocks or tripped over tree roots. Exhausted, Lana did the one thing she hoped she wouldn't have to do.

She took off her dress.

Of course, it wasn't like she was left naked. Lana had been wearing about five layers of fine petticoats and simple dresses under her gown. She pulled off all of the layers, then dressed herself in the lightest layer. She was still beautiful, unfortunately, but she tried to get rid of some of her beauty. She rubbed mud into her skin and chopped her hair short and uneven using her knife.

Lana traveled for a few days until she came upon a pack of orcs. If she had been under the Author's power, she would certainly have killed them all. As it was, she had no weapons training and was good as dead.

"Please," she said, "Do not kill me." She tried to look as beautiful as was possible in her dirty, ragged condition. "Instead, please take me to Sauron." Perhaps she could bargain with him, as long as she was given a chance to tidy up and look 'presentable'.

A week later, Lana was presented to Sauron. She was still dirty from her travels, but she figured that it wouldn't matter. Sauron looked like he wanted to kill her.

"My lord," she started, her voice confident though her heart was pounding and her palms sweating. "I have come to... I have come..." She couldn't think of what to say. Lana had absolutely no idea what she had been planning on doing once she got there. She groped for words, then finally a thought hit her. It was perfect.

"I have come to offer my services," she said proudly. "I will protect you against the Mary-sues- your so-called 'daughters' that magically appear." Sauron nodded at this, considering it.

"Fine," he said. "What is your name, girl?"

"Lana," said Lana. "Though I wish for a different name, one that is more... like a title."

"Koss," said one man. "Keeper Of Sauron's Sanity." Lana agreed to it, and she was no longer known as the Mary-sue Lana.

She was Koss.


End file.
